John: He secretly longs to enter a decorative pastry competition.

Harold: He writes historical romance novels under the pseudonym Harriet Dove.

Joss: She moonlights as a dominatrix.

Lionel: He goes clubbing on his off days, and is renowned for his dance moves.

Sam: Clearly, she's an Elvis tribute artist.

Root: Ironically, she maintains a vast collection of Care Bears.

Leon: Around the house, he wears makeup and a pink wig.

Zoe: She's a vampire, and part of an ancient secret society.


What? No! I'm not weird! You're weird! Meep.